the Dick van Dyke Show is the best television show ever. And here is proof.
Awesome.
Saturday, July 24, 2010
See that Calling? Magnify it!
these are not actual callings in a BYU singles ward. At least, I don't think they exist. From a chat with Doug and Dani:
greeter?
greeter?
me: wicked
unclean
heathen
pagan
Doug: no one morns the wicked
me: um...ok
Doug: mourns
7:42 PM moms
looks like morns
7:43 PM unjmmmmmm
says scott
7:44 PM 3+++++++++++++++++++,m
says scott
| 8 minutes |
7:52 PM Doug: nummy num
7:54 PM nummy num num
7:57 PM hymn book passer outer?
7:58 PM table cloth lady in the relief society?
shrimp and pimp coordinator?
7:59 PM birthday celebrator?
8:00 PM assistant to the assistant tablecloth lady?
ward smiler?
8:01 PM ward prayer coordinator
?
assistant program hander outer
?
8:06 PM calendar marking person
sunday identifier
assistant program proof reader
visiting teachee
8:07 PM ward wedding coordinator
mission call announcer
mission paper helper
8:08 PM ward complimentor
complimenter?
ward new calling inventor
| 5 minutes |
8:14 PM Doug: member number 32
member number 37
those are seat assignments
they call you to a seat
8:15 PM endowment temple trip coordinator
ward cellist
8:16 PM ward soloist
weekly solos
8:17 PM ward g above middle c player
ward pulpit duster
assistant fashion consultant to the R.S. 2nd counselor
8:18 PM ward old hard bubble gum on the bottom of chairs scraper off-er
8:19 PM me: ward music stand coordinater
Doug: assistant to the chairman of the ward "keeping hands sanitized because of swine flu" committee
8:20 PM ward fountain statue
8:21 PM ward swimming party in the fountain coordinator (no diving its not deep enough and don't run its slippery)
8:22 PM chairman of the ward committee to eradicate gossiping
and curfew breakers
8:23 PM ward tooth brushing consultant
ward eating a balanced diet specialist
8:25 PM ward choir assistant alto section leader
ward birdwatching merit badge counselor
8:26 PM advisor to the imaginary laurels class
imaginary ward laurel
8:27 PM imaginary ward inactive member (to give the ward missionaries some work to do )
8:29 PM ward cheerio picker up-er if any visitors bring kids
8:30 PM ward reverent child
8:31 PM ward ward prayer skipper outer
8:32 PM ward diversity coordinato
r
8:33 PM ward football ticket coordinator
ward february temple trip assistant coordinator
8:34 PM stake primary president
8:37 PM chairman of the ward committee to remind people to be kind and nice
8:38 PM member of the committee to remind ward members to call their mothers on a regular basis
8:39 PM me: member of the committee to remind people to remove their nail polish before going to the temple
8:41 PM Doug: member of the committee to remind people to cover their sneezes
member of the committee to ensure that ward members understand 3 Nephi 4:22
8:42 PM member of the committee to ensure that members can sing the song "Latter-day prophets"
your frozen
8:43 PM me: 22 And thus it became the desire of the people of Zemnarihah to withdraw from their design, because of the great destruction which came upon them by night and by day.
8:45 PM It says we're already in a video chat
but we're not
8:47 PM Doug: ward rainbow recognizer (when you see a rainbow activate the ward telephone tree so that it can be enjoyed by all)
8:48 PM ward singer of "There is Sunshine in my Soul Today" on rainy days
8:49 PM Ward imaginary secret admirer to awkward return missionaries
8:50 PM Ward blind date setter upper
me: You haven't actually spoken for several minutes
Doug: ward creeper
stop magnifying your calling
8:51 PM ward provider of marshmellow so that we can make rice crispy treats
8:52 PM secretary to the chairman of the committee to keep the toilets clean
8:53 PM assistant to the secretary of the committee to assist the committee to keep hymn book pages crinkle free
8:55 PM chairperson of the committee to feed hungry stray cats
| 5 minutes |
9:01 PM Doug: ward kisser of boys in the front room
bye
me: bye
Saturday, January 30, 2010
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